Animith's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[CoolJaw: T.T. III-V]

Review Request Club

Awesome. Again, really great artwork, nice backgrounds, another development of the plotline...not really giving anything much away, but answering a few tiny questions. Enough for closure's sake, but nowhere near enough to make a person be able to stop here and think they'd seen enough of the story, especially given the rather massive present-time cliffhanger you put on in the previous episode. Though I am wondering just how you'll start wrapping this up, as (theoretically) you only have two more episodes left of this chapter to do...needless to say, I'm intrigued as to what's coming. So again...really great work. But now I have to be pedantic again, if only because your artwork and plot only leave room for the pedantic things to be criticised.

I agree with Coop that 'inevitable' would have been a better word choice, because...it's just far more foreboding. Both inevitable and eventual mean pretty much the same thing, but inevitable as a word feels a whole lot more like there's ABSOLUTELY no escaping it, and it's imminent, and it's coming right now. Eventual is more...lethargic? Like "Yeah, doom is coming...maybe. Could be a year or so still...". It's just semantics, but they're definitely a powerful tool at your disposal, and two words of exactly the same meanings can give off entirely different implications.

There were a few grammar errors, as before, but nowhere near the amount as last time. So I'm just going to eschew my pedanticism, list the ones I found and speak no more of it. :P
"Malik I have cancer I'm dying"=> "Malik I have cancer, I'm dying"
"the arms dealer sent us bits, & pieces" => "the arms dealer sent us bits & pieces"
"Malik, & I" => "Malik & I"

And speech bubble thing...was better than in the last episode. There was a definite sequence where one bubble came out JUST before the other, so your eye went to that one first and you just generally had more of a chance to get the conversation the right way around, but I think if you're going to continue with the animated speech, that gap between the two or more speech bubbles could maybe be extended even more, just to affirm the order of conversation.

So...yes. Still awesome, I'm still hooked, curious as to how you'll finish this chapter off...still a few slight things that could be improved, but they were vaguely negligible and were much improved since the last episode. Keep it up! And sorry again for the ramble. xD

-Review Request Club

Celx-Requin responds:

I'll try to spice up the spoken dialect from now on...
Thanks,
- Celx

[CoolJaw: T.T. II-V]

Review Request Club

I was really looking forward to the next episode of this, so yay that I now get two to review! :P

Firstly, what I liked: Again, the artwork is really awesome. It feels even more maniacal than last time, which gives the panels an even more macabre and desperate twist to them; everything about them is just...unsettling. Which, given the genre you're working in, is a definite plus. I can't remember whether I mentioned this last time, but I love the format these episodes are in, the sort of pseudo-comic book style. It allows people to progress at their own speed (Great when you're trying to review it), and the static nature of it also just makes it even more creepy. Before I get onto the criticisms...know I really liked this. And some of the stuff I'm mentioning I'm mentioning because this would have been a 10 without.

The typos. Ahh, the typos were really irksome. Forgive me, I'm a little neurotic when it comes to grammar, and it's irritating to see that something as trivial and fixable as grammar/spelling isn't completely right. Here's the ones I picked up:

In the frame where his radio goes off, he says "This is important so I come by your office..."
Should be "This is important so I'll come by", or "so I will come by..."
--
When he's having the phonecall with Bateman, he says "I wan't $2000". Want has no apostrophe. Same thing two frames later.
"...And I have some pictures of a really f*cked up murder, you might be interested in"
There's no need for a comma, if you're going to put one in there it should be "...f*cked up murder, you might be interested in THEM"
---
In the frame starting "Things work differently here than they do in Duram...", there's about five typos alone.
First, unless you're talking about a fictional place, Durham is spelt thusly.
'Carrer suicide' should be 'career suicide'
"thier surviving kin", should be THEIR surviving kin.
"That need to bury a son, duaghter..." should be DAUGHTER
"regardless what they've done" should be regardless OF what they've done.
---
"Sad to see your one of them" should be YOU'RE one of them.
---
You're doing yourself a disservice on something that's completely remediable with a proof-read, and I think it's a shame because it's not as if you're lacking in the more complex realms of artwork or storyline.

That being said, I was in two minds about the speech bubbles being animated...I can't remember them being so last time and I'm not sure if it helps or detracts from the creepy feeling. That aside, the positioning of the speech bubbles and the way that, if two were on the screen, they both came up at once, didn't help. Half the time I read the wrong speech bubble first and got confused. Having them go left to right or right to left is fine, but just keeping it consistent throughout would be a major help, because it kept seeming to switch.

The plotline itself was fine; this lacked a lot of the action your former one did, although had a major cliffhanger right at the end...I think if anything, that could have been built up to even more than it was, but then again, that final frame is very ominous-looking and generally just...foreboding. Chilling. Awesome. Like I want a copy of that frame to keep as a picture, awesome.

All in all...great artwork, good storyline. Have quarrels with the speech bubble positions, irked about the typos, but yet again I find myself wanting to watch the next episode. Which I'm doing right now. Sorry for the ramblesome review. xD

-Review Request Club

Celx-Requin responds:

This was an excellent review, please see my response to Haggards review for my thoughts on the text.
Again I must state my admiration for your thoughtful, and useful reviews.

Sincerely,
- Celx

[SpeedE The WFD]

Review Request Club

For a first submission, this shows a lot of promise. But at the same time, a lot of room for improvement.
The graphics in general were a little flawed at parts; during the fight scene the jock with the sleeveless jumper loses the shoulder strap, and the WFD guy loses the outline to his elbow. At the start, the background also looked somehow under-drawn, and the band-leader guy kind of jumped from being vaguely far away from Stanley to right next to him. Just a little flaw, but something that could be fixed with a second look.

The lip-sync was okay, but at the points where you had the close-up of anyone's face it was obvious that it was a little static on the animation side. However, the voices themselves were pretty good and the music/sound effects worked well...although the drums in the music you chose weren't exactly fast.

The animation again, was alright, but could have done with some improvement; when the jock does the chicken movement you can see the outline of his body stick out from his arms (Don't know how else to describe, sorry), and the nunchucks were very artificial for a weapon that's meant to be very fluid and dynamic.

In general, this has promise. I think as a first flash to NG this is better than most, but as has been said, there's places to improve. When you make another one, try and make the episode a little longer so the storyline's a little more fleshed out, and you could have yourself the making of a pretty good series; keep it up.

-Review Request Club

McAfee-Enterprises responds:

Hey Animith, thanks so much for your review and comments etc....I felt they were right and we hope to be able to do many of the things you suggested......The make it longer seems to be a common comment and I agree fully and again we really hope to in the next SpeedE episode.........For some background SpeedE started as the main character in level 5 of WFD The Game as seen and played at Worlds Fastest Gamer

Well after Addicting Games picked the game up WFD The Game produced well over 1.5 million plays in it's first 90 days and from those plays and the internet etc SpeedE started to take some legs and walk around.....:) So this is his first few steps if you will......

We really hope to make SpeedE into a series and do welcome any input or collaborative efforts/suggestion from any of you guys here on Newgrounds.......Again thanks so much and if anyone wants to help SpeedE takes a few more steps please let us know.......????

[21 Pains]

Review Request Club

The fact that the only bit of the characters that seems to move are the mouths is quite unnatural, and the lip syncing in general is off. In a way, it kind of contributed to the humour of the piece, but I still think there could have been a little more animation in general. Or if not animation, then a bit more detailing; the background's pretty plain and I could work out what the flashing lights were until the mention of the police. And couldn't work out for the life of me where the bullets were coming from because the guy seemed to be bleeding from his back but the holes seemed to be coming from the side...though I guess that's not very important. I think the simplicity of the animation helped you a little, but at the same time it could definitely have brought the entire thing up if there was a little more animation.

I think in general it was perhaps a little longer, but that might have been due to the lack of visual variation, so I found myself just sat listening to the dialogue. Though the dialogue itself was pretty funny. The lines about the 5cm, 'Uzbek language', the Romeo and Juliet, the wedding were all nicely delivered. The jokes later on kind of fell a little, but that probably had more to do with the fact they were a little more outside my humour and because the flash in general was dragging a little.

In short, the animation of this brought it down and the humour brought it up. I think even a little more visual movement would have helped improve this a LOT, because although the jokes in general are funny, the fact the screen is so static is a semi-major flaw. In general though, this has a lot of potential, so definitely keep at it.

-Review Request Club

MonoFlauta responds:

"The fact that the only bit of the characters that seems to move are the mouths is quite unnatural, and the lip syncing in general is off."
Yes that it was because i tryed to make it by as :p it would look more natural and better if i would did it by another way but i wanted to try it :p
"And couldn't work out for the life of me where the bullets were coming from because the guy seemed to be bleeding from his back but the holes seemed to be coming from the side"
The bullets where coming from a lots of places :P you couldnt see the ones that hit him in the back because they wherent in the stage :P a house has most of time 4 walls :P haha
"Though the dialogue itself was pretty funny. The lines about the 5cm, 'Uzbek language', the Romeo and Juliet, the wedding were all nicely delivered. The jokes later on kind of fell a little, but that probably had more to do with the fact they were a little more outside my humour and because the flash in general was dragging a little."
Haha thanks :p i wrothe them and yes maybe with a better animation they would be more funnier :p thanks a lot :P
"In short, the animation of this brought it down and the humour brought it up. I think even a little more visual movement would have helped improve this a LOT, because although the jokes in general are funny, the fact the screen is so static is a semi-major flaw. In general though, this has a lot of potential, so definitely keep at it."
Oks thanks a lot for the review :D

[Cunt Burgers]

Alright, but needs work.

I think I'm pretty much following in the same vein as the last three reviews; it's a good start, but there's a lot of room for improvement.

The movement of the characters is a little stiff, if you made their animation a little more fluid (even to just have them have a walking animation instead of have them slide from place to place) the movement scenes would look a lot more realistic.
The colours in general are pretty well chosen, though the brightness of the bushes in the first scene and the green monster were a little sore on the eye given the kind of earthy tones everything else had.
The voice was alright, though the sound quality was a little off, and the emotion of the voice didn't really change from scene to scene much. You also could have really benefited from other sounds, such as background ambience, a few more reaction sounds (bird noises, yelling, etc.) just to give the flash a little more dimension.

It's a fair start, but I think you could do a lot of small things to improve this in a big way.

-Review Request Club-

TheReturnOfTomsPulp responds:

Fuck you

[CoolJaw: T.T. I-V]

Great premise, great cliffhanger.

I like the artwork of it in general. There's something incredibly macabre about it from the first screen, even before you really know what's happening. And having gone through the first act, I see the narration text has gotten a lot more erratic, and it works to your credit, because it just gives that added touch of foreboding. I might as well mention here: The music is really fitting. The way it flits between ominous background noises and the guitar, and yet still maintains the mood perfectly. Really nice choice, there.

I got a few vague Saw vibes? From the antagonist-in-the-TV, do-something-horrible-or-bad-things-w ill-happen idea, but the parallel pretty much draws to a close straight after that. This has a fresh kind of creepiness to it. I think the fact it's a frame-by-frame comic and not a flash just adds to the melancholy aspect of this; like it would be less scary if it was all totally moving.

The "GOD NO" reply from the guy during the dialogue seemed a little superfluous, and almost distracting from the demands the TV-man was making. But apart from that, the premise is set well and all you needed do at that point is make something utterly disturbing to bring the scene to a peak.

Which you did. Marvellously. I could be a pedant and say "You couldn't cut a nose clean off like that with one swipe of scissors", but I think the bounds of reality can be stretched a little given how utterly disturbing the image is itself.
However, the "AAA" in his reaction-shot was again, a little distracting. I almost wish you'd found a non-textual way to convey his reaction, as it's obvious that he'd be horrified and in absolute pain, and it's obvious that you can create certain emotions in the backdrop and artwork in general, anyway.

The abrupt flick-back to Mr. Jaw in the alleyway was also a nice touch, as you leave the now-noseless man simultaneously at his cliffhanger and conclusion-you almost know that he'll carry out all the other tasks asked of him, and yet you're unsure as to whether he'll be able to do it.
And if that wasn't enough, you've got the closing line implying that Mr. Jaw's vendetta has barely even started. So it's safe to say you've gained a follower here. I have a need to know what happens next. Great work.

-Review Request Club

Celx-Requin responds:

Perhaps the best review I've ever received, also can you pm me in exactly what Saw movie this whole nose cutting off business occurred? My curiosity has been peaked, and I'd like to check it out.

Also you're really sharp, when it comes to following the clues I've felt...
Well done.

Sincerely,
- Celx

["EXTINCT"]

Firstly, and lastly; NICE art.

I really loved the merging of the 2D and the 3D, as well as the different styles of colouring used on the different things (Background/foreground/characters). There were a few instances, especially with the cat, where the outline seemed quite rugged or something about the lines/colouring could have been improved a little, but in general it was nicely done.

The storyline is pretty simple, but it fits well with what's generally a light-hearted and near-comical flash. The things like the slow-motion falling out of the tree were perhaps more funny than I should have found them, but again, they just add to the light-heartedness of the beginning. While this first section may have been a little too long and could have possibly done with a little more going on than the cat chasing the butterfly, in general it was wonderfully inoffensive.

Your choice of music and sound effects are also very fitting; again, quite a cheery accompaniment, with enough sound effects to highlight events without there being so many as to be irritating.

The part where the cat falls asleep and seems to fall into a brief dream-sequence involving butterflies confused me a little, as I wasn't sure whether the cat was dreaming or whether you'd just changed the background colouring for effect. Maybe if it had been a little longer at THAT point you could have established it a little more, but given the brevity of the sleeping-cat scene in general, perhaps it being short works in its favour.

And the ending, while quite sad and unexpected, was pretty well done. Although it did go a little too fast between the forest and the shop and the museum, perhaps.

Just to be a bit of a grammar pedant, your ending dialogue doesn't make grammatical sense.
I think it said "It exist thousand years ago"...when it should have said "It existed thousands of years ago", or some such thing.

All in all, this was a really nice flash. Until the unhappy ending, of course. Deserved a little higher than 5th place, given how everything fits so well together, but c'est la vie. Very good work, overall.

-Review Request Club

manuelberja responds:

more thanks!