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Review Request Club

The very beginning sounds quite odd; it sounds like the final two thirds of a reverbed sound, in that you don't hear the attack of it, but still hear the trail-off. Not trying to make a big deal of it, but is was a little odd. Anyway, onto the track.

Rest of the first 30 seconds go without complaint. It's obvious it's a track that's going to slowley build up, and starting with 'crowd' noises before the more melodic synths came in was pretty cool. I can't tell what exactly comes in at :28 but it did seem to have a little too much treble on it given that most of the other synths were in the mid-low range. However, by 0:45ish you start hearing the automations bringing the pitch down, which is both a nice touch and a rememdy for this as the sound sinks more into the texture.

Definitely have to compliment you on your use of sounds and automations for the first minute; given that the only melodic thing there was a single pulsing note, you did keep the beat feeling fresh and interesting throughout the first minute, which is pretty cool. I also notice the high-ish sound just keeps diving further until it becomes a really bassy beat, which again is both unique and interesting to hear, because you wonder just how low it'll go, and so the simple melody doesn't even figure into the mind as a point of complaint.

When the new beat/melody is established at 1:20, I'd say the drums could do with maybe being a little further out of the texture, because you can hear they're quite heavy, but don't quite get to feel it as much as you do the bass synths. Maybe even making the drums a little bassier would've helped this (Though in saying that, maybe I'm saying the totally wrong thing xD not exactly an avid listener of techno, here :P)

And again, while you have got a relatively simple melody, you keep changing up the sounds that are supporting it, and so instead of the track dragging, you keep it sounding new and interesting, which is definitely something to be commended for a song this length and for melodies as simple as two-note and three-note sequences. Even though the main idea stays pretty much unchanged for the last three minutes, it still sounds unique and interesting. So this is perhaps the first pretty lengthy techno track I've pretty much enjoyed reviewing a lot, so kudos for that. xD

You've definitely got the talent needed to carry a simple melody for a long time, but I'd say you could even extend that further; change the beat up a little more, maybe even have a break in the middle and go somewhere a little more ambient, or even a little heavier. But that's just clutching straws; this track is really well put together, I'm not sure there's anything from this that I'd really say you needed to change. Which makes a change!

I'll probably stop rambling here. But basically...yeah. Cool track, cool sounds, major kudos for keeping a simple melody sounding interesting...keep it up, definitely.

-Review Request Club

Dj-GST responds:

The beginning sound is a very low crash (though it may not sound like one), with a very high amount of reverb to it, the original kinda started that way so this one does too.

Lol, I love my slow buildup :) That "high treble" sound is the kick, with a modified filter to make it sound like a pumped rimshot, then it transitions into it's full self.

Bassier drums? Not a bad idea...

Yeah, I figured that since the melodies aren't complex at all, that a few background transitions would make the song less repetitive.

I'm happy that you liked this so much man, I'll be sure to have more out soon :)

Review Request Club

One thing I'd say that stuck out while I was typing this the first time around is that this doesn't loop very well, for a loop. There was a bit of silence at the end which made the loop-back feel more abrupt. If you took that silence/fadeout out completely, the beat would probably hold up a lot better than it does now.

That being said, the levels of this were really nice. You had a good beat and texture with the different synths, even some lightly modulations in places; the break in the middle was cool, I think if the track itself was longer I'd've said the break could have done with being a little more played out, but given the brevity of the track it probably works better for being the short break it is.

In all, it's pretty short, if you have the time I'd definitely say look into making this a longer track, let it go more places before it has to loop back. Generally though, you have yourself a nice little track, here. Keep it up.

-Review Request Club

Review Request Club

Lyrics are insane. One thing I'd say is think about putting them in the author comments just so people have a chance to read them through. Your diction's pretty good, even with the faster passages, but even then some people might have a hard time understanding. But generally, they sounded really good and you pulled them off smoothly. The breaks into the sung vocals were a nice touch, though I think you sounded stronger the second time than the first; the first sounded a little wobbly and kinda nervous, but the second sounded pretty ace. The high note at 3:05 felt a little out-of tune, but not very much so. Nice work on the freestyled lyrics as well xD. I've heard people just run out of lyrics and stop trying, but you incorporated it into the song well, so it didn't seem that bad, so kudos for that.

The beat behind was pretty simple, I think you could have changed it up between the spoken and sung sections, but that's not that big of a deal. It was pretty downplayed, so it had a lot of emotion in it and allowed the words to take precedence over the track. In general, this was just really nicely done. Work on that final verse and I think you'd be golden. Keep it up.

-Review Request Club

Review Request Club

Really like the bass in this; it's really in your face and gives the whole track a nice foundation to build on, so even though it's really the only synth for about 40 seconds, it doesn't feel sparse. The slightly-glitched drums also really help add to the industrial feel of it.

Robot voice was definitely funny xD. I thought the "sex sex sex" part was a little overdone, but it wasn't that bad. And was just about to say you kinda needed the robot voice to come back in again to tie the start and end together, and then it did so, which is cool. One thing you could have done is maybe manipulated the robot voice a little so it could have had a part in the middle section as well; not as a lead part, but just as a sort of ambient electronic presence.

On that note, while you had a pretty nice depth throughout, you probably could have gotten away with adding a few more synths in just for effect; maybe a few more glitches or just electronic sounds to emphasise that feel a little more. Generally though, this is a nicely polished track. Good luck on the album! (:

-Review Request Club

Review Request Club

Feels quite dramatic at the start; the bassier drums felt quite soft at the start, but that's not very detrimental. Though in general, I think this could have used more bass. Even just a simple, sustained low note on the double bass or something, just to give it some real depth. Because you've got a nice soundscape here, but everything's kind of in the middle frequencies and quite distant, so a solid bassline (or even some deeper drums, like the ones at the start and the ones that come in at 1:54) would really help give it more grounding.

You portray the emotion quite well, but I think the melody line could have been brought out more of the texture, perhaps emphasising the feeling of solitary you already sort of get from the flute, and more than tht, give the listener something to focus on. You could definitely also think of having a second lead instrument play a harmony behind the flute, just to thicken out that lead texture a little more.

In general, this is very nicely written. Quite slow moving; I think you could have played more with the dynamics or keys just to keep it as dramatic as it starts, but I think you hit the emotions quite well, so nicely done.

-Review Request Club

popraz responds:

Thank you ! I am trying to gather all the suggestions I've received and use them to make a new song (a really long one too), so thank you very much for the detailed review, it helps a lot.

Review Request Club

Nice powerful beat to start with, which is always good. The bassline could be a lot bassier than it is; right now it's kind of hitting the mid frequencies more than anything. And the cut-out of the kick beat at 0:45 really felt awkward; you lost that gravity and were just left with this mid-frequency synth and light drums in the background, which felt a lot less cohesive than it did when it was weighed down by that really heavy beat.

The change at 1:29 in instrumentation was good, but the fact that the melody stayed unchanged was quite noticeable. If you're not going to change the melody, you definitely need to add more elements or automations in just to try and keep the track sounding fresh; nothing feels more repetitive than a repeated lead line, that's for sure. Another quick-easy-fix would be to change the melody up. You do this at 2:45, and it works well; if you'd incorporated that in at 1:29, I think this song would drag a lot less.

Generally, you've got a lot of good elements here, it's just a case of tying them in together a little better. Mix up the sections a little more, bring out the bass...if nothing else, bring back the heavy beat from the start at some point, because that was a definite highlight of the track. Melodies are hard to do, but you've already got two here, so its just a case of incorporating them both more evenly into the song.

-Review Request Club

Review Request Club

I got to about 30 seconds in and then had to pause. I...really don't get what you've done here at all. It sort of sounds like you made the remix, then added in a few random distortion effects and emulators for fun, and then accidentally exported it like that. Everything seems out and distorted, and there's no real cohesion save for the fact that everything seems like it's several feet underwater.

There's...some good ideas here? The voice starts to sound quite ethereal and you've got a good drum in there...god knows you've got a good coverage of the mid-lo frequencies...but the sound of it completely wrecks this, it just doesn't make sense at all. This definitely needs a second look just to work out why everything sounds so distorted and why both frequencies you're using are so occupied by all this stuff. That and the lack of ending is quite odd.

It's alright, there's some good ideas in here, but as a remix it really doesn't work, to be quite frank.

-Review Request Club

DXsamurai responds:

thanks for the review but damnit i already got a review from the Review Request Club.
stop already. I get it damn distortion. ok

Review Request Club

Definitely from the start sounds like you wrote this for someone to sing/rap on top of. Simply because the mixing's pretty light and everything is generally in the sort of background. That being said though, you've got some nice instruments in this; good sounding synths, a pretty ace drum beat (Though I also think the cymbals were perhaps a little overdone). One thing I think this is probably lacking is a nice bass line. Like, a really bassy one, because you've got a bass here, but it's still pretty middle-ish in frequency, so you've pretty much got the mid-hi frequencies covered, but the bass lacking a little bit, save for the kick drum that comes in. That being said, the bass does get more prominent later on in the song, so perhaps it's just the start that needs a second look.

There's a nice bit of variety to this, which is good...I think some sections were a touch too long, but that would be remedied if you had someone with lyrics on top of it. Generally though, you've got a nice sounding track, here. I think while it is a standalone you could remix it so that the lead synth feels more like a lead instrument, until the time when you actually do get a vocalist to come in and take that main-interest role. You could probably go on the NG forums and try to find someone to do the vocals for you, there's a fair few singers/rappers on NG, that's for sure. In general, it's a pretty decent track. Nicely done.

-Review Request Club

SymbolCymbal responds:

LOL yeah the bass i used is actually a monosynth just played on a ow octave so it doesn't really get that bassy sound that it needs. When i revamp this for thew lyrics coming soon from newgrounds own mc BIGRED aka Tintonger. I did put some actual bass later in the song im glad you picked up on that. it took me a bit to mix that. Unfortunately i have to do most of my mixing with crappy speakers and or earbuds.

Tintonger had sent me some lyrics for the beginning of the song and just from hearing his other stuff i think this song is going to be a really awesome and creative one.

Im glad you like the variety whenever i am composing i never want it to get boring. if you check out some of my first submissions like dreamwalker or HIT ME organ donor you can see that i do alot of rhapsody type composing. Im really glad you liked this one. i spent alot of time on the train to work composing this a 1/2 hour at a time on my laptop using earbuds.

When i get the recorded lyrics from tintonger im going to remaster and revamp a few things so thank you for the constructive criticism, i will definitely take it into consideration while remastering this.
The completed song will be sold on a newgrounds charity album for either haiti or some other charity we come to an agreement to in the audio forums

Again thanks for the sweet review

Review Request Club

Nice introduction. The slight filter-changes on the piano worked to make the first seconds not sound repetitive, though I think another synth could have possibly come in before 0:28 just to support the piano a little more.

When everything else comes in, you've got a nice mix going; the drum's there, but not cutting through anything, and there's a nice warmth of texture which works very well. At 0:58 when the pads cuts out I'm in two minds because the piano's not all that supported for about ten seconds, but then everything comes back at 1:10ish and it sounds pretty solid again.

While the initial piano riff is cool, having it play through for 2 minutes is overdoing it a little bit; changing the octaves or the instruments (As you do nearish 2:00) would help make the opening half of the track feel less static. And even then, 2:00-2:50 and onwards is just a repetition of the theme that's alreayd been, so I think definitely you could have used a second theme taking over the main one at points just to break it up a little more.

One definite thing to improve would be that, I think. You use the same chords, same melody and the same beat throughout, so by the 5th minute it feels incredibly repetitive. Break it up with different sections, different melodies or harmonies...you do well in changing the instrumentation a few times, but playing that melody straight through the whole thing runs that massive risk of it sounding like the same thing over and over. Especially as you sacrificed the bitrate quality to get it on NG, I'd say you could shorten this song quite significantly, thus having a higher quality track on here, and managing to keep it catchy, and not draggy, which is never a bad thing. This has definite potential though, so keep it up.

-Review Request Club

Dj-GST responds:

Thanks man.

I'll work on the repetitiveness when I make another track.

I don't really wanna shorten it, if someone wants a high quality version, they can just PM me (as comments say).

Review Request Club

Nice introduction; you've got a pretty nice beat set up by the drums, and you've covered all the main frequencies by about the 5th second, which is always cool to see. We like balance in a song.

For an improvised line, the lead synth is pretty cool; there's a lot of different melodies in there and even some really cool dissonances as well, in parts. The automations also work really well to keep the track feeling varied; variation is definitely one of those things you need in a song like this, because the backing accompaniment doesn't change, so the lead has to do something pretty spectacular to hold the attention, which it essentially does.

In terms of improvement, you could maybe think about having breaks in the background beat to go into slower sections with just the synth, or just changing up the beat a little. And maybe even add a vocalist in, even? It's the kind of song that could support something like that, definitely.

While the improv was cool, I think five and a half minutes of the same beat was a touch on the long side, but not so much so that it got boring. So nice work, overall, it definitely got pretty trippy in places. Keep it up.

-Review Request Club

MixyRecords responds:

Thanks, i appreciate your critique. Very in depth analysis. I agree with you about mixing up the background beat; it is something I should have make the track better.

Not much to say...I like writing music, hoping to improve a lot on that front. I like reviewing things, as I'm far too opinionated not to. I'm amazingly awkward as a person. But all in all, I mean well. (:

n/a, Female

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